This is my final contribution to Common Climber as part of the Farewell Edition (January 2025). Common Climber has been a labor of love since 2016 - nearly 11 years of sharing stories - our stories.
Sometimes we make choices of our own volition, sometimes choices are made for us through circumstance. As alluded to in previous editorials, I have been juggling Common Climber amongst other life demands, but it is the health challenges that take the most mental, emotional, and physical energy to manage. In this circumstance, I have no choice but to work around the cards that have been dealt. I need to make room for wellness, healing, and change.
I hope this story provides a little peak into the circumstances that have been guiding some of my decisions. Of course, continuing to be able to climb is a powerful driver in it all.
Thank you for the journey.
Sometimes we make choices of our own volition, sometimes choices are made for us through circumstance. As alluded to in previous editorials, I have been juggling Common Climber amongst other life demands, but it is the health challenges that take the most mental, emotional, and physical energy to manage. In this circumstance, I have no choice but to work around the cards that have been dealt. I need to make room for wellness, healing, and change.
I hope this story provides a little peak into the circumstances that have been guiding some of my decisions. Of course, continuing to be able to climb is a powerful driver in it all.
Thank you for the journey.
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"Don't fall."
That is what the neurologist told me after looking at the MRI of my cervical spine. There are three spots of severe stenosis in my neck, where my spinal column has collapsed and is infringing dangerously close to my spinal cord. "Don't fall. Don't let a chiropractor touch you. Don't get in a car accident," he said. What does that even mean? Don't fall. Don't take a 30-foot whipper and flip upside down and whack my head? Don't slip on scree on an approach with a 20-pound pack on my back? Don't trip on a shoe in the middle of the night when going to take a whiz? He gave me prescriptions to manage the symptoms: swelling and tingling in my hands and feet; nocturnal leg and foot cramps that made me scream so loud for Rick's help that, if the neighbor's heard, they might have called the police; a near-constant pressure headache that won't go away - this is above and beyond the tear-inducing migraines; feeling dizzy and off-balance; occasional reduced control over my right leg, with sensations of heaviness and weakness; slowed digestion to the point where I had to start eating soft foods, lest I back up for so long that I look pregnant from distension; difficulty getting words out verbally. He commented that the extent of my stenosis is pretty severe for my age. He then shrugged and asked if I wanted to schedule a follow-up in 6 months to a year. WTF? Drugs and shrugs. |
Stef leading a run-out pitch (one of many) on Beuhlah's Book, Red Rock Canyon, NV (Photo Credit: Rick Momsen)
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For the past year I have been shuffled from one doctor to another, taken one test after another. The spectrum of symptoms could have come from any number of issues, may of which have been explored. In one phlebotomy sitting they drew more than 15 viles of blood. Nearly my entire body has been scanned. Things have been discovered, including this spine problem.
In addition to the neurological issues, I have been having a plethora of strange symptoms the - blood pressure changes, heart arrythmias, shortness of breath, hair loss, dry mouth, dry eyes, swollen tongue, exhaustion, and feeling like I constantly have the flu or covid - but without the fever or positive tests.
Are these additional symptoms autoimmune related? Could the neurological issues be multiple sclerosis? Some early blood tests showed some concerning results. The neurologist ordered a brain and cervical spine MRI. Negative on the MS, positive on a collapsing cervical spine. Unknown about other autoimmune possibilities. (In a previous story I wrote about the autoimmune-related intestinal issues I had years ago, but went into remission.)
After the "don't fall" instructions, I sought out a second opinion - this time with a spine surgeon. He echoed the sentiment - don't fall.
"What exactly does don't fall mean?" I asked. I needed to identify the severity of the consequences. Can I climb? Can I hike?
In addition to the neurological issues, I have been having a plethora of strange symptoms the - blood pressure changes, heart arrythmias, shortness of breath, hair loss, dry mouth, dry eyes, swollen tongue, exhaustion, and feeling like I constantly have the flu or covid - but without the fever or positive tests.
Are these additional symptoms autoimmune related? Could the neurological issues be multiple sclerosis? Some early blood tests showed some concerning results. The neurologist ordered a brain and cervical spine MRI. Negative on the MS, positive on a collapsing cervical spine. Unknown about other autoimmune possibilities. (In a previous story I wrote about the autoimmune-related intestinal issues I had years ago, but went into remission.)
After the "don't fall" instructions, I sought out a second opinion - this time with a spine surgeon. He echoed the sentiment - don't fall.
"What exactly does don't fall mean?" I asked. I needed to identify the severity of the consequences. Can I climb? Can I hike?
Stef on a "low 5th class" approach - basically a free solo - to get to the climb. Don't fall! (Maybe this looking up position and carrying a heavy pack with rock climbing contributed to the cervical spinal stenosis?) (Photo Credit: Joy Jones)
"It means death or paralysis," he replied. "It means surgery on your neck - and soon. But I'd like to order some additional neurological test to determine whether the sheath of the spinal cord has been damaged."
Fabulous. More fucking tests.
Is there some other autoimmune disease causing some of these other symptoms or even the severe premature degeneration in my neck? Can all of my symptoms be explained by the spine problem? Do I just have bad genes? Did climbing, looking up, and carrying heavy packs all these years do this to my neck? (I have read that athletes tend to have more spinal stenosis...) Or sitting wrong in front of a computer for so many years? Who the fuck knows. More tests might bring answers.
For now, what I do know is, if surgery on my neck can fix this and stop the most debilitating symptoms - and enable me to climb - I'm in.
Admittedly, the thought of having surgery on the neck is freaky. I have learned that, for single vertebrae section repairs, they go through the front, bypassing the esophagus and major arteries. Apparently going through the front is easier and has a faster recovery. Whodathunk?
When there are multiple repairs, often they go through the back of the neck - which is more risky and complicated with a much longer recovery.
And, the type of repair option - fusion/metal plates, disk replacement, bone removal - depends on lots of factors, the analysis of which is beyond my pay grade.
With three severe spots in my neck - one of them probably causing most of my symptoms - I don't know what option they are going to take. Do I fix the worst spot by going through the front of the neck, knowing there may be more surgeries in the future for the other two? Or do I take care of all of them now to avoid another surgery and knowing there is higher risk and a much longer recovery?
Hell if I know. But what I do know is if fusing my neck together with metal plates relieves the pain, the symptoms, and allows me to be on the rock (despite setting off metal detectors for the remainder of my years), let's get her done. Like now.
Anything for the climbing, my friends. Anything for the climbing.
Fabulous. More fucking tests.
Is there some other autoimmune disease causing some of these other symptoms or even the severe premature degeneration in my neck? Can all of my symptoms be explained by the spine problem? Do I just have bad genes? Did climbing, looking up, and carrying heavy packs all these years do this to my neck? (I have read that athletes tend to have more spinal stenosis...) Or sitting wrong in front of a computer for so many years? Who the fuck knows. More tests might bring answers.
For now, what I do know is, if surgery on my neck can fix this and stop the most debilitating symptoms - and enable me to climb - I'm in.
Admittedly, the thought of having surgery on the neck is freaky. I have learned that, for single vertebrae section repairs, they go through the front, bypassing the esophagus and major arteries. Apparently going through the front is easier and has a faster recovery. Whodathunk?
When there are multiple repairs, often they go through the back of the neck - which is more risky and complicated with a much longer recovery.
And, the type of repair option - fusion/metal plates, disk replacement, bone removal - depends on lots of factors, the analysis of which is beyond my pay grade.
With three severe spots in my neck - one of them probably causing most of my symptoms - I don't know what option they are going to take. Do I fix the worst spot by going through the front of the neck, knowing there may be more surgeries in the future for the other two? Or do I take care of all of them now to avoid another surgery and knowing there is higher risk and a much longer recovery?
Hell if I know. But what I do know is if fusing my neck together with metal plates relieves the pain, the symptoms, and allows me to be on the rock (despite setting off metal detectors for the remainder of my years), let's get her done. Like now.
Anything for the climbing, my friends. Anything for the climbing.
The transition between pitches 2 and 3 on "Myster Z," Red Rock Canyon, NV (Photo Credit: Rick Momsen)