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WTF 5.7?


By Stefani Dawn
Dear 5.7,
 
I really want to be your friend, but your personality changes like clothes on a runway model. One minute you are a cruiser, with jugs and great pro, the next moment you force me into Cirque de Soleil contortions and run out.
 
I know, I know, in some demented twist of my psyche I’ve gotten used to your propensity to stick out your surface like a mocking tongue. Or, perhaps, it’s more like a diving board since falling on a tongue would at least be cushy. But when you decide to jut out, the least you could do is make it really sweet, where I can kick off my shoes and sit on my ass while belaying.
 
Oh, and speaking of three dimensional body parts, the slick Buddha belly bulge just doesn’t belong with your type. Unless you give me a hand up off to the side, where I can merrily pass by, inserting bomber pro and playfully pat your shiny belly, this type of sketch is more becoming of your older brother, the 5.10. But, you just don’t seem to get that my dear, as you have thrust way too many bellies in my path and made me clamber ungracefully for dear life.
 
5.7, you are supposed to be sweet, honest, and innocent, or maybe I misunderstood and that’s 5.5.  But, I’ll be damned if you don’t play some cruel tricks. Do you remember the time, times really, when you blazonly displayed your crack, bottom to top, for all the world to see? You advertised, come hither, I will hold your pro with care. But when I arrived you were shallow and superficial or flaring your big mouth. Either way, you threatened to spit out or swallow what I offered, rendering me essentially unprotected.
 
Oh, and I won’t even bother elaborating on all the times you shed your shit on me like lead-filled dandruff. Or when you came off in my hand as I flailed over one of your protruding parts.
 
What about the times when you looked like you were nicely featured, promising holds galore? Then you did it again, and pulled the rug from beneath my feet.
 
It is becoming clear that I have a hopeful fantasy about you. In reality, 5.7, you are the epitome of unpredictability, about as two-faced as they come. But, like the Pavlovian dog who has received the occasional reward, I keep on trying. I guess the joke is on me, WTF?


This Made Me Laugh!

The WTF 5.7 Tour: Red Rock Canyon

I wrote this article several years ago and it inspired the current 2019 WTF 5.7 Tour my husband, Rick Momsen, and I are doing in Red Rock Canyon. Basically, we are climbing every single 5.7 in Red Rock Canyon, NV and identifying the ones that we would call a WTF 5.7 (which are likely old school trad climbs and/or climbs on some of the crappiest rock you've ever laid feet and fingers on...). So how many climbs is that? 237 climbs.
  • 48 sport, 10 toprope, and 179 trad climbs.

Below are three WTF'rs we've encountered so far.

To keep up with the status go to the WTF 5.7 main page. If you are curious about the plan details then check out "The Plan."
Picture

Miniwanka ​at the Yin & Yang crag

Picture

Too Many Tantrums ​at Mescalito E

Picture

Young and Restless at Three Peaks 

Picture

Pauligk Pillar ​at Mescalito E

Picture

Lean and Languid near The Fox

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  • Writing
    • All Writings (List)
    • Editions >
      • Themed Editions >
        • Adaptive Climbing Edition >
          • Adaptive Climbing Photo Feature: Paradox Sports
          • Advocating for Deaf Climbers: Sonya Wilson
          • Amputations: Leg Prosthesis for Climbing
          • Blind Ambition Builds a World Class Climber: The Story of Jesse Dufton
          • Climbing with Type 1 Diabetes
          • First Paralyzed Ascents: Rand Abbott
          • Mixed Climbing: My Answer to KT Syndrome
          • Paraclimbing Competitions: Althlete Interviews
          • Rock!
          • The Unreasonable Man
        • Belaytionships Edition >
          • Featured Photographer: Charlie OlGrady-Kessner
          • Belaytionships: Drew-and-Sarah
          • Belaytionships: Jeantique and Natalie
          • Belaytionships: Maggie and Charlie Odette
          • I Am My Father's Son: Layton Bridwell
          • Book Review: Uncoiling the Ropes
          • Zac the Interloper
        • Big Wall Edition >
          • Book Review: Paul Preuss: Lord of the Abyss
          • Featured Photographer: Matt Spohn
          • Grading Commitment
          • Hanging with the Monkeys, and Getting the Monkey Off My Back
          • It Was His Time: Brad Gobright Interview May 2019
          • John Middendorf : A Big Man for a Big Stone
          • Sébastien Berthe Free Climbs the Nose From the Ground Up
          • Shit Happens – Or, Why You Need a Walkie Talkie
        • Developers and Guidebook Authors >
          • Developer - Mitch Lehman
          • Andrew Penny - A Blue Mountaineer
          • Kevin Powell
          • Rock Star Groupie
          • Tony Calderone
        • Exploring Our World >
          • AUSTRALIA - Photographer - Diego Perez
          • AUSTRALIA - Profile - Julie Anderson
          • Book Review - Climbing Rock
          • CHINA - From Yangshuo, to Getu, to Liming
          • FRANCE - Verdon in Winter
          • GREECE - Meteora
          • ITALY - Dolomites
          • MEXICO - La Huasteca
          • SPAIN - Artist - Karmelo Onate
          • UTAH - Maple Canyon: This One Makes You Taller
        • Honoring Diversity >
          • ARTIST: Shawn Lee
          • A Shift on Moonlight Buttress
          • Claiming a Space on the Mountain
          • Colorblind
          • Feature Photographer: Bryan Sillorequez
          • Is Diversity in America Diverse?
          • MOVIE: People of Climbing:
          • Profile - Favia Dubyk
          • The Lineage
        • Joshua Tree >
          • Bouldering: JTree Made Me Do It
          • Improv at JTree: Bad Bolts
          • JTree: Bolting Pressure Cooker
          • Joshua Tree: Heinous Approaches
        • Overcoming Boundaries >
          • Photographer - Brook Anderson
          • Profile - Louise Shepherd
          • Profile - Megan Banker
          • Profile - Shawn Axelrod
          • Rock Type 1
          • The Tape Job
        • Women's Edition >
          • Editorial - Women's Edition
          • Climbing is My Art
          • Mt. Logan Solo
          • Photographer - Michelle Ranee Johnson
          • Profile - Caitlin Schokker
      • Non-Themed Editions >
        • April 2020
        • May 2020
        • June 2020
        • August 2020 >
          • Online Auction
          • Editorial August 2020
        • September 2020
        • October 2020
        • November 2020
        • December 2020 >
          • Anthology 2020 Sponsors
        • January 2021
    • Topics >
      • Adaptive Climbing >
        • Adaptive Climbing Edition
        • El Capitan: Enock Glidden
        • Quinn Brett Interview
        • My Journey to Adaptive Rock Climbing
        • Planning for Mt. Rainier: Adaptive Climbing
        • Resources - Adaptive Climbing
      • Alpine & Ice >
        • California Still Has Untouched Climbing Wilderness
        • Ice Solo
        • Mt. Ogden Spanking
        • Mt. Whitney Whipping
        • My Common Alpine Epic
      • CC Profile >
        • Profile - Shawn Axelrod
        • Profile - Megan Banker
        • Profile - Favia Dubyk
        • Profile - Debbie Fowler
        • Profile - Lindsey Hamm
        • Profile - Sabine Pratt Hunziker
        • PROFILE - Marisa Michael - Nutrition for Climbers
        • Profile - Caitlin Schokker
        • Profile - Louise Shepherd
      • CoVID and Climbing >
        • COVID Climbing Memes
        • CoVID-19 Remakes Our Lives
        • Dear Memory
        • From Couch to Lifting Couches
        • How to Climb and Avoid the Corona Virus
        • Train the Mind: Mental Toughness Tips for Quaratraining
        • The 5.10 Commandments
        • Trying to Send this Route
      • Equipment (writings) >
        • A Rack Retrospective
        • Cam Ranges (+ Big Bros)
        • Carabiner Strength Ratings
        • Climbing Shoes Fit
        • Guide Book Follies
        • Rope Buying 101
        • Shit Happens – Or, Why You Need a Walkie Talkie
        • The One Item to Stockpile
        • Which Way Should I Carry My Trad Rack?
        • Why GriGris Suck
        • 8 Reasons I Carry a Full Rack on Every Trad Climb
      • Facebook Feature >
        • FF: Big Walls
        • FF: Butt Shots
        • FF: Exploring Our World
        • FF: Overcoming Boundaries
        • FF: Trees & Climbing
        • FF: Welcome New Climbers
      • Grades, Styles, & Types >
        • Bouldering-Falling
        • Bouldering Grade Advancements
        • Grading Climbs at the Gym
        • It's a F-ing Chimney
        • Onsight vs Flash vs Etc...
        • Top 10: Increase the Climbing Grade When...
        • Trad Climbing is for Chicken Sh*#s
        • WTF 5.7?
        • 18 Climber Types: Which Are You?
      • Kids >
        • Family Stages
        • The Guidebook
      • Legends >
        • B - Joe Brown
        • G - Brad Gobright
        • G - Todd Gordon
        • H - Hugh Herr
        • H - Thomas Huber - In Another World - A Personal Climbing Journey
        • J - Saxon Johns
        • M - Tim Macartney-Snape: ​A Legend from Sea to Summit
        • M - John Middendorf
      • Mental-Physical >
        • Climbing Training Series >
          • Improving Hip Mobility
          • Rock Climber Mobility
          • Train the Mind: Mental Toughness Tips for Quaratraining
        • A Climb Worth Fighting For
        • Achilles
        • Everyone Around Me Is Better Than I Am
        • Fear, Pride, and Exploration
        • How Auto-Immune Disease Affected My Climbing
        • Mastering Joy on Easy Street
        • Mind, Body, and Soul
        • New Year's Resolutions
        • Of Cartoons and Quickdraws
        • Push and Pull
        • Sorcerer and the Kidney Stone
        • Take Risks - You'll Remember Them Later
        • The Art of Climbing Without Rock
        • The Devil's Game
        • The Taste of Climbing
        • 12-Weeks to Onsighting a 5.8
      • Other/Misc >
        • Assault on Schurman Rock
        • Book Club
        • Climbing, Community, and the U.S. Presidential Election
        • Climbing Drinking Games
        • Climbing Gyms: The Gateway Drug
        • Climbing Hands
        • Climbing in the Bare Essentials
        • Climbing Resolutions
        • Demented Dirtbag
        • Don't Take Granite for Granite
        • Dorothy, We Aren't on Havana Anymore
        • Guatemalan Worry Dolls Go Climbing
        • No Health Insurance Changed How I Climb
        • Snakes and Ladders
        • Starting Over
        • The Adventure of A Lifetime - So Far
        • The Bane of Northwest Climbing
        • The Pink Tricam
        • Things of Stone and Wood
        • Zac the Interloper
      • Places & Climbs >
        • Climbs >
          • Consolation Prize
          • Flakes and Shakes: Flake Crack Revisited
          • From Yorkshire to Eternity
          • Tombstone Territory
          • Yosemite - What We Came For
        • Location Reviews
        • My Home Crag >
          • Climbing in the Upper Cumberland Valley, Kentucky
          • My Home Crag: Nowra, NSW, Australia
        • Travel Stories >
          • Blue Mountains - Bliss: Climbing in the Blueys
          • Buenos Aires, Argentina Crag
          • Colorado - Calling Pat Ament
          • Coolum Cave - Sendfest 8
          • Ecuador - A Nation of Four Worlds
          • El Potrero Chico - Riding the Dirty Dog
          • Yosemite: Growing Up
          • Lover's Leap - Zone of Craptitude
          • Rio de Janeiro - Classic Climbs Sampler
          • Taghia, Morocco - Hardly Failing
          • Tasmania - Legend of the ‘Unclimbable Cliff’
          • Thailand - Lost and Found: A Mini-Epic in Paradise
          • Vedauwoo, WY
          • Yosemite - What We Came For
          • 20 World Destinations for Adventurous Climbing
        • 2020 U.S. Rock Climbing Festivals
      • Poetry/Prose >
        • Anti-Social Climbers
        • Sojourn at Dyuritte
        • Finding Poetry
        • Ice is Nice
        • The Space Between
      • Safety and Skills >
        • Bolting and Ground-Fall Potential
        • Euro-Death Knot is NOT
        • Multi-Pitch Tips: Two ATCs
        • Sketchy Anchor Bolts
        • Sliding-X Anchor
        • Three Ways to Use a Stick Clip
        • Top 10: Climbing Best Practices
      • Science Fiction >
        • Red Curtain: Prologue
      • Social, Social Media, & Social Issues >
        • Chossy Trio Renegades
        • Climbing into the Fold
        • Diversity in Climbing is Not a Bandwagon
        • Fuck "Gumbies" and "Noobs"
        • Montana, My Home: Claire Larson
        • My Husband Climbs Stronger than Me
        • Navajo Rising
        • Social Network Rescue
  • Marketplace
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    • Climbing Addicts Colored Chalk
    • Climb-On Maps
    • Dynamite Starfish
    • Furnace Industries
    • Grimpi
    • Heroclip
    • MoveWell with McGee
    • Mystery Ranch
    • Neilico
    • NW Alpine
    • Rockytalkies
    • Tension Climbing
  • Reviews
    • Books >
      • Advanced Rock Climbing Book Review
      • Adventures at the Edge of the World
      • Climbing Rock: Vertical Explorations Across North America
      • Hangdog Days Book Review
      • Hooking Up: The Ultimate Big Wall and Climbing Guide
      • Paul Preuss: Lord of the Abyss
      • The Sharp End of Life: A Mother's Story - Book Review
    • Equipment/Gear Reviews >
      • Belay Device Review >
        • Edelrid Mega Jul
      • Harnesses >
        • ArcTeryx-FL-365
        • Misty Mountain Cadillac
      • Packs and Bags >
        • Sukoa Chalk Bag Review
        • Trango Crag Pack
      • Personal Anchor Systems >
        • Camp-Daisy-Twist
        • Petzl-Dual-Adjust
    • Location Reviews >
      • Australia >
        • Queensland, Australia >
          • Kangaroo Point Photos and Beta
          • Kangaroo Point Review
        • New South Wales Australia >
          • Blue Mountains >
            • Blue Mountains Photos and Beta
            • Blue Mountains Review
          • Nowra >
            • Nowra Review >
              • Nowra Photos and Beta
      • Mexico >
        • Potrero Chico Photos and Beta
        • Potrero Chico Review
      • United States >
        • Climbing Area Check List - U.S. >
          • Climbing Area Check List Part 1: Alabama to California
          • Climbing Area Checklist Part 2: Colorado to Michigan
          • Climbing Area Checklist Part 3: Minnesota to New Mexico
          • Climbing Area Checklist Part 4: New York to Wyoming
        • Arizona >
          • Queen Creek Canyon
        • California >
          • Joshua Tree >
            • Joshua Tree Tips
          • Mount Whitney >
            • Mount Whitney Photos and Beta
        • Idaho >
          • City of Rocks >
            • City of Rocks Photos and Beta
            • City of Rocks Review
        • Oregon >
          • Smith Rock >
            • Smith Rock - Photos and Beta
            • Smith Rock Review
          • Spring Mountain >
            • Spring Mountain Review
            • Spring Mountain - Photos and Beta
          • Trout Creek >
            • Trout Creek Photos and Beta
            • Trout Creek Review
        • Nevada >
          • Gun Club
          • Keyhole Canyon
          • Mt. Charleston, Nevada
          • Red Rock Canyon >
            • Red Rock Canyon Review - Yeahs and Neahs
            • Red Rocks Photos and Beta
        • New Hampshire >
          • North Conway, NH
          • Rumney, NH
        • New York >
          • Gunks Review
        • Utah >
          • Echo Canyon
          • Ferguson Canyon >
            • Ferguson Canyon Photos and Beta
            • Ferguson Canyon Review
          • Ibex >
            • Ibex Photos and Beta
            • Ibex Review
          • Maple Canyon >
            • Maple Canyon, Utah Photos and Beta
            • Maple Canyon Review
          • Moab >
            • Moab - Main - Photos and Beta
            • Moab -Main - Review
          • St. George >
            • St. George - Prophesy Wall- Photos and Beta
            • St. George - Prophesy Wall - Review
        • West Virginia >
          • Seneca Rocks
        • Wyoming >
          • Ten Sleep
  • Photographers & Artists
    • A- Brook Anderson
    • B - Florian Beyer
    • C - Karen Chan
    • D - Daga Dygas
    • F - Eric Fallecker
    • G - Max Gordon
    • J - Michelle Ranee Johnson
    • K - Christine Kuebler
    • L - Shawn Lee Illustrator
    • M - Alex Messenger
    • N - Tiffany Nardico
    • O - Charlie OlGrady-Kessner
    • O - Karmelo Onate
    • O - Camila Ospina
    • P - Diego Perez
    • S - Bryan Sillorequez
    • S - Stephen Smithburger
    • S - Matt Spohn
    • V - Laura Vallo
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      • Dave Barnes Extended Bio
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    • C - Carrot
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    • D - Stefani Dawn
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    • G - Joshua G
    • G - Leesa Gallia
    • G - Naomi Gibbs
    • G - Enock Glidden
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    • R - Monique Richard
    • R - Juan Rodriguez
    • S - Lor Sabourin
    • S - Jess Sanson
    • S - Jeff Smoot
    • T- Frothy Thomson
    • T - Wil Treasure
    • T - Matt Tredway
    • W - Kirby Walke
    • W - Hugh Ward
    • W - Wayne Willoughby
    • W - Lani Wilson
    • Z - Peter Zabrok